I was supposed to be going home to my family, but the nurses on our shift told the nurses coming on that we would place the patient’s body in the body bag before we left. So I grabbed the body bag and watched the nurses seated before their computer terminals they looked pretty settled and I wanted to go home; so I walked back to the patient’s room by myself.
The patient was a small light lady and I knew I could place her in the bag without difficulty and so that is what I did. She was stiff and the sort of pale color that is singular to death except where the now blue blood was accumulating, the interior of her elbow for instance.
I unfolded the bag and unzipped it. The bag spelled of formaldehyde and briefly reminded me of the dissection I had done in A&P class. I placed the bag, open, alongside the further side of the patient’s body. I gently lifted her head and moved the bag into position beneath her, muttering “God bless you” repeatedly under my breath. I then placed her head into the body bag, I lifted her hips up with one hand enough to slide the bag beneath her with the other, and finally I placed her legs inside the bag. During this process the thought that I focused upon was respect, it was totally apparent that her body completely void of any life, and yet it was apparent to me that I must faithfully serve the soul which once resided there in. Having done that to the best of my ability I zipped up the bag to her foot, which I left exposed as the nurses still needed to place the toe tag on her.
I then said a small prayer, left the room, told the nurses that the task which separated me from home had been completed, picked up my jacket and my Kindle, and left. I called my wife and reluctantly told her why I was late. “You had to do what?” she responded. I told her I had done it by myself so I could come home and then I saw a white passenger van, which had been going the other direction, sitting with its front smashed in; empty and dark save for the light of emergency vehicles and head lights. I asked my wife if we could pray as I was now having a hard time processing the world around me. We said an “Our Father”, a “Hail Mary”, and a “Glory Be” and I drove the rest of the way home and gave my family some love.
The following morning I woke up still thinking of the patient and the body bag. I realized that all I had allowed myself to think about and focus on was that I was treating the body with respect. As I thought about the situation more as a whole I wondered if I hadn’t been wrong to take it on by myself. The more I placed myself back into that situation, however, the more I felt certain that I was not by myself. I thought quickly about the other people on the unit and reassured myself that I was indeed by myself; I also grew more convinced that I had felt someone else in the room with me.
It occurred to me that I was somehow in the presence of the care of God for the soul and as that thought slipped into place I felt the peace of the Holy Spirit descend upon me and I have been at peace with the events of that evening since that moment.
I am not at all sophisticated enough to know who was with me at that moment. I am thankful to God for the sake of that woman that He was there. May God bless us in His love and mercy; now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
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